I feel like I have something to say but not quite sure what. I might as well update you although I doubt that anyone actually reads this. Actually now thinking about it I have nothing to say. Oh dear. I did go to a party yesterday at my friend Liam's house, it was pretty good but I got drunk quite early and ended up crying over (well something I can't actually remember) I'm sick of getting upset for no reason. I always feel guilty the next day too like I've done something TERRIBLE when in actual fact I haven't done anything and in actual fact I've just been really boring. I always feel dead clingy too when I'm drunk like I'm annoying everyone around me and then I stop caring about what I look like so I'll just be all slouchy and fat and minging; oh my god why do people even talk to me. The bad thing is though, is I don't want to stop having to drink because I'm already miserable and boring as it is so if I stop and still go out I'm going to be the only one sober and I know that it'll just really bum me out. SIGH. I just wish I knew what was wrong with me. I know I'm probably being over dramatic and I'm actually just really boring since alcohol is a depressant etc. etc. - but no one else seems to be as sad as me. WHY AM I SO BORING AND MISERABLE AND JUST TOTALLY UNEXCEPTING OF OTHER HUMANS EMOTIONS OH DEAR LORD.
really sorry for complaining, I'm even annoying myself.
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